One of the things I discovered after turning 40 is I cannot rely on anyone else to make me happy.  Happiness, joy, peace of mind—all come from within.

Now, as a baby boomer woman in her 50s, I am more determined than ever not to be driven by someone else’s thoughts of me and to continue to run this race with endurance.  Here are my keys to happines.  What are yours? 

1 Take Responsibility
There is no fairy godmother coming along to rescue you from your mess, bad habits, missteps.  Sorry! It’s up to you to get your own act together.

2  Get Relationships in Order
It doesn’t matter if they are your intimate relationships or other ones. Get them in order, make them right with your family, friends whatever. You cannot get it all perfect – there are some people that you simply will not gel with. Don’t waste time on them, spend time making the relationships that are good for you work. Deposit into them.

3 Know That Change Begins Within
Your life will begin to improve the minute you take action to improve it.

4 You Are What You Listen To
Put music into your life – it makes all the difference – Wake up to music – Turn The TV off – play happy feel good songs in the morning – you will be amazed at how it can change the energy of your entire household.

5 Deposit Into Your Self Esteem Bank Account
People either fuel you or drain you. So does everything you do. Accept compliments, talk and think about the good things in your life. Find a cheer squad – surround yourself with people who deposit into you, don’t be around people who drain you and make constant withdrawals.

5 Look For Solutions Not Problems
We get what we focus on! So focus on the good things – start practicing gratitude – be grateful for your life and the things and people you have in it. Once you start this way of thinking you will find even more great things – if something is not going right – look for what you want.

7 Become Your Own Best Friend
Treat yourself the way you treat others – especially the way you treat your best friend. Use nice towels, drink from nice glasses. You’re worth a squillion dollars – are you treating yourself that way? Look after your body, your health and your mind. After all you get what you put up with – you deserve to be treated well and it all starts with you.

8 Improve Your Self Talk – The Key to Success is Improving Your Self Talk
Look at the good bits – become your own cheer squad. Remember you can’t divorce yourself – so you might as well start telling yourself what’s right about you. Start in the mirror – tell yourself the good things – smile at yourself and stop the negative stuff when it comes up. For more help on this one, purchase a mirror.

9 Listen Only to Winners
There are a heap of people who will give you advice on your money, your health, your career and your relationships as well as many other things. Remember birds of a feather flock together and misery loves company. So ask yourself next time someone offers you advice, “are they practicing what they preach”? Are they a winner in that area. If not smile, say thank you and move on.

10 Know There is a Huge Difference Between Existing & Really Living
After all you deserve to really live. Existing is hard and slow. Do what’s necessary to put the spark back in your life. Celebrate birthdays, have some fun, do something frivolous, live as if you only have a month left on this planet. Fill your life with great people and then, you too, can share your own secrets to happiness.